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parenting tips
How to give Proper Instructions to your Child!
Your child should know you are talking to him or her.  Get physically close to your child and look him or her in the eye as you give clear and precise instructions.

Examples of Good Instructions: 
  • Aditya, give me the truck.
  • Pushkar, go wash your hands.
  • Steve, look at the book.
  • Rashika, put three blocks in the bucket.
    Examples of Bad Instructions:   Why it's a bad instruction:
    • Be careful
    • Can you put your toys away?
    • Go upstairs, wash your face, brush your teeth and go to bed.
    • Okay, I think it is time for you to go to bed
    • Don’t run in here.
    • Stop horsing around!
    • Can you give the toy to your sister?
    • It is time for you to go upstairs to go to sleep.
      Too vague
    • Don’t ask, tell.
    • Too many instructions.
    • Too many words
    • Negative and too vague
    • Negative and too vague
    • Don’t ask, tell
    • Too many words

    Basic Social Skills for young children
    We often have parents asking us about the lack of social skills in their children and about what to teach them. Our Facilitator has extracted the following basic Social Skills that need to be provided to children in the formative early year:
    • Introducing Yourself
    • Following Instructions
    • Getting Along With Others
    • Having a Conversation
    • Accepting Compliments
    • Giving Compliments
    • Listening to Others
    • Asking Permission
    • Asking for Help
    • Showing Sensitivity to Others
    • Accepting "No" for an Answer
    • Disagreeing With Others
    • Staying Calm
    • Apologizing
    • Being Honest
    • Accepting Positive Criticism
    • Q & A for Parents
Its Important to Say NO to your child!
As an average sort of parent, you were probably upset the first time you had to tell your toddler "No" when he did something wrong and now the toddler is older and you still have to use the word "No" and you will as long as he is living at home and perhaps for years.
Being a person is what growing up is all about and when a child expects you to say "Yes" all the time, then it is time to rethink your parenting skills. It is wonderful to say "Yes" to life and the world and also to your child, but we live in a world that requires us to say "No" and also mean what we say. We have to be in charge of our children as we are the parents. If we reverse these roles then we will have major problems.


You surely need to respect a child's push toward autonomy but you will have to find ways to show him that you, too, recognize that he is growing into his own person, with expanding rights and privileges. He can't see that this transition from helpless babyhood to responsible adulthood takes a long, long time and comes gradually, but you can help him to come to this understanding.
If you don't say "No" when you feel it is in the best interests of the child, then it becomes a battle of wills. You will feel that you have not only lost the battle, but the war, because the child will not listen and obey your requests and decisions. You have to realize that you are trying to raise your child to have pride, dignity, and good judgment as you have learned these traits yourself from your parents. To be an adult takes a lot of practice in being a person.
Be consistent, don't ever change rules and/or punishments from day to day. Set limits; have only a few rules and then don't budge an inch from them. Elastic limits lead to insecurity. Make sure the child knows exactly what to expect.
For example if your teenager has a curfew of l0 p.m. and you allow him to talk you into extending this curfew to ll p.m. then it becomes a pattern that he will expect to be allowed the later curfew. Sure there will be special occasions such as a school dance, but he still doesn't need to be out any later than you instruct him before leaving your home. Once you give in to him then it will be harder and harder to set your limits and have the standards that you have had in the past.
At times if you give in you will start to feel as though you are losing control and at this point you need to sit down and think about what you are doing and immediately regain control. A child will actually respect authority if it is given with love, confidence and caring and realize the rules are necessary. Sure you will have bad times when he wants to argue with you and request limits be changed or extended and sure there will be exceptions but hold your ground, so to speak, you'll be glad you did. Don't say "Yes", when you want to say "No", then sit and wonder why you changed your limits and standards.

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